Thursday, September 06, 2007

A Game That Should Exist

You may know that I moderate the gaming forum "Games People Play" over at, and if you know that, then you'll know I eat, breath and sleep video games.

In another light, someone said that PurePwnage is simply a documentary based on my life.

Anyway, I could go on about myself all day, and to be honest, I rather would...But apparently the sun doesn't shine out of my arse, and I'm not the centre of the universe (blasphemous bastards, the lot of you).

Well that was a brief introductory to explain that I've been around the block in terms of video games, and therefore I'm an opinionated bastard, with an opinion that stands for something.

Now, I've been throwing movies onto my fancy pants new PlayStation 3 for the past week (it's lovely, and all you 360 fanboys can go catch a bus. With your faces.); one of these movies was Equilibrium.

Now you may be thinking, "What the fuck is that?" and/or, "By the sound of things, you watch some serious shit."...If you think either of these things, then I suggest you go to your medicine cabinet, consume the entire contents of said cabinet, and stick a plastic bag over your head, taking deep, heavy breathes as you slowly rid the planet of your dithering existence.

Equilibrium is set following an apocalyptic third world war, the strict government of the dystopian city-state Libria has eliminated war by suppressing all human emotion. In the monochromatic and sedated society, artifacts from the old world (works of art and music that may evoke some emotion) are destroyed and the population is required to take sedatives. Grammaton Cleric First Class John Preston, a man trained to locate and arrest those guilty of feeling emotions, finds himself abandoning the drug and experiencing outlawed feelings. As he struggles to conceal his feelings from his superiors, colleagues, and family, Preston finds himself drawn into a sinister world of double-crossings and lies, and becomes an unwitting pawn in a sophisticated plot which ultimately changes the repressed society forever.

But enough of quoting Wikipedia...Go and rent the film, and form your own outlook on it, you drones of human existence.

Watched it yet? Good.

Now you see a lot of games that can cure the average frat boys virtual bloodlust these days...But I'm far from falling into that stereotype, hell, I'd probably consider myself to be bouncing along the other end of the scale.

And in turn, you'll see a lot of 'fun and happy' games including bright colours, and the unrealistic idea of a happy ending.

So you have several categories covered...But what about the games for malevolant bastards like me, who get erections at the thought of putting infants into an oversized blender (virtually and hypothetically of course).

Now you maybe thinking back to the film, sure, not a lot of blood...But hold on a minute, there were quite a few deaths.

Here's some trivia for you, The character John Preston is recorded as obtaining the most on screen kills ever. More than the likes of Rambo, James Bond and Blade.

Now for the number buffs, the recorded number is 118 kills...Which I could obtain after about 2-3 hours playing DoDS, but the main difference, and a pretty damn good reason to make the game is this.

Gun Kata.

The way of the gun.

It's efficient, likely to keep you alive in improbable situations, allows you to cause maximum potential damage in any given situation...And it looks fucking awesome.

Also, with today's fancy pants HD graphics, and realistic physics...It's a possible trophy winning celebration of mass killings with added style.

I'd ask your opinions on this one, but I know that I'm right.

1 comment:

yoyo said...

Meh maybe I'm biased about that film because I hated sean pertwee being a bad guy. He will be a raving ageing surfer forever in my mind. (see:bluejuice)

And, update more, you goddamn slacker!